Practice – Practice – Practice

IMG_1063I started following along with Stepahnie Ackerman’s Documented Faith in late June.  I love the concept!  I know I’ve shared I for before, but here’s my take: it’s an effort to focus on God’s Word in manageable, bite-sized chunks…one word each month accompanied by weekly scripture relating to that word.  Simple, manageable, memorable.

So I’ve been practicing… practicing by writing consistently… something I haven’t been successful with in the past.  And writing in bite-size pieces versus the entire buffet of my life.  When I committed to #write31days, something I wasn’t aware of was that I limited myself to two handwritten pages per day…bite-sized pieces…manageable vulnerability.  Usually I make things more complicated, but it seems this decision is actually turning out well!

My focus is on God and how He is consistently working in my life, through me…to reveal Himself to me.  When I slow down to take one step at a time, the mountain isn’t so big, the task at hand isn’t so overwhelming and Matthew 6:32-34 takes on a deeper meaning.

32 These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. 33 Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.

34 “So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.

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#write31days – Day 6

 As rocky as 2013 started, I had no idea just how crazy life would get! Even as things were becoming very clear my dad’s lifestyle demanded a dramatic change, I was finding myself thanking God for the multiple hospital visits throughout 2012.  As difficult as those times were, God eased me into accepting the New Norm for my dad – the roles were shifting – his sense of independence waning as he fought changes with all his might – his identity was completely wrapped up who he believed he should be – along with the unrealistic expectations he placed on himself….and any deviation triggered tailspins of Looney Tunes  Tazmanian devil  (if you’re younger than oh…say 45, you might want to google the reference!) proportions.

I was thankful, because in the year prior, I not only made a point to become more informed about my dad’s medications, bills, etc. (stuff that’s so easy to overlook ), I was given the gift of time to get to know my dad as an adult – a person outside of my bubble.  There was a big part of me that didn’t want to accept the change either…not because becoming a caregiver wasn’t my cup of tea…because he was my dad…the strong, independent, pain in the rear guy who loved to help other people in his community.

Today…as I’m still learning to Embrace a New Norm, I can’t help but think about a few Tazmanian monster moments of my own….

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Behind the Mask

For months (and months) Romans 12:1 has been on my bathroom mirror…

“…in view of God’s mercy, offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship.”

While I’m sure this verse can be interpreted many ways, to me it’s about transparency – is what’s on the inside apparent on the outside?  Often perceptions can be  skewed if we rely only on what we see physically.  However, more often than not, we rely on physical sight alone.

For many years, I’ve been overweight.  My physique can be perceived in many ways –

she doesn’t take pride in herself…

What are you hiding from?

What are you hiding from?

she has no self-control…

if she would only exercise…

does she look in the mirror????

I could go on and on, but you get the idea.  The real question? What is she hiding from? If you’ve read my testimony, the answer is easy – rejection.  To varying degrees, I have placed my value in the affirmation of others – I have circled that mountain many times, but each time God brings me closer and closer to Him.  I’m moving beyond intellect to belief .

Join me on this part of my journey as I seek God’s courage to tear down the physical barriers and allow Him full restoration access.